the sky, inside and me

[Poem] of the day: 'Each man’s death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.'
-For Whom the Bells Tolls by John Donne

I'm calling the next few months Improvement Months.
Why? Well, I'm planning to go all out on refining my skills. I am going to experiment on my drawings and try writing. More and more.
More and more.

Of course, I can't make it as effective as I would've liked. Sure, I'm pretty lazy with homework. I admit that. But  I know I will be trying to boost up my grades. Not like it was bad last year, but I'll be honest, I want to top the grade. Can't a child live up to her parents' expectations?

Teachers tell me to be more than my parents. I don't need to be told twice-- I already have a huge dream. Others think of the chances they'll fulfil that, I think of HOW I'd get there. I've always been optimistic. Somehow, I'd get there.

I always wonder how the sky is like that. The universe is vast and dark. How come, when the sun shines on earth, the sky is a light blue? That question is close to home, but my mind is working on the angle to tilt the question. I suspect it has something to do with sun's rays getting filtered by the atmospheres, much like auroras, and looks blue. I think I read something like that about sunsets...
Back to topic, what I mean by the sky is the sky and universe. Look at supernovas! Such death is beautiful. Morbid, sad, but beautiful. I hope the stars can rest knowing they left their impressions inside the minds of men and other beings alike.

So when the sky divide open and become a red rose like (glowing) oil.
QS. 55 Ar Rahman : 37

That verse (ayat) is from the Qur'an, explaining about supernovas. I think that's how I got so fascinated with the universe. To me, knowledge is art. The more you know, the more things become beautiful. I can look outside and see a rainbow, and know that the falling rain and sun created it, but it never fails to retain its miracle-like impressions. I see through the eyes of a child I am.

Are you creative? Because I think I am. Whenever they show me a painting, or a picture, or a photo, I always see more than what is shown. Sometimes they show me a picture of nebula, and I see animals, and people, and sometimes they seem to be reaching for the stars, or embracing life. I love it. Universe stimulates both my mind and soul, and I just want to embrace it.

There is something undeniably alluring about knowledge. It tempts me, and it teaches me. Like a mentor, it  teaches me how everything come be, and like a lover, it shows me the beauty of it all. Knowledge is beautiful.

The sky is my role model. To be vast, knowledgeable and somehow be so mysterious!

 My dreams are set high, and its hung on a star 100 light years away. It's so far, so high, but I want to know everything between me and my dreams. Others can be dream of being a doctor, or teacher, or police, but I will still remain rigid in my seat and proclaim that I will attain the title of Professor. I want to be an astronomer, then become a psychologist to combine the beauty of universe and human minds. I will make my life a scientific art.

I believe in God, and my religion. I do not believe that humans are this majestic without a lent hand of a higher being. I believe in miracles, I believe in angels. Science and religions create a truly beautiful painting. I can see it in my heart- the bold and daring and calm, and the holy and sweet colours blending like colours in the sunset.

It think it would be nice if I can surpass my parents. Especially my father. I've always admired him for being so patient and sticks to his principles and stay so strong. I've been asking lots of impossible questions, so I think I'm doing good. A head start is always good! I have no time to waste on 'enjoying life as a teenager'. Well, not wasting, but I feel happier doing what I'm doing right now.
Arrivederci!

Physics and how I dumbfound my family

Fact of the night day: Above title is truth. While tea is healthier when you want a drink you can consume many times daily, coffee actually helps protecting the eyes.

Okay, so after taking a 3 hours nap I did not want, I'm wide awake at 11 pm and ready to bash my head. But instead of doing that, I decided I want food and rummaged through the bookshelves.
Guess what I found?
My 260-pieces puzzle! I actually finished it a few times years ago, but I took it out anyway.

I found books I've been looking for a year. There's my 5th grade Social Studies book and the first part of Let's Play Guitar. I've been looking for the latter for its Greensleeves score, and first thought it was left in Jordan. Looks like I was wrong.
On a completely unrelated note, there's a picture of Benito Mussolini where he looks like a choked goldfish. No offence, Mussolini!
And that is why my curiosity is good.

Also, I played some songs from the book. Silent Night, and such. My sister went by and pointed at our Christian neighbour's house and said, 'I think you should live over there.'
It's funny to see my family looking uncomfortable when I mention or do something "Christiany"! Funnier when your father is a diplomat who knew his fair share of non-Muslims. So far I think I'm the only one who doesn't get worked over the whole different religions thing, considering all my internet friends are non-Muslims. I don't see any problems with listening to Christian hymns like Abide With Me, and frankly, I think choirs at churches or cathedrals are very good! I've always liked the atmospheres of Cathedrals. It's just my family treats it like a big deal.

Back to the title, I also saw my old Astronomy books and saw just how far I went. Astronomy? Give me time travel theories! Yeah, that's how far. And also I've been reading some quantum physics, and I'm happy knowing my many-worlds fantasy is supported by science. Good job, Schrödinger, you made a girl very happy.
So I proceeded to see just how much my mother knows (lol) and asked her if she thought time travel was possible or not. She said no. Well, she was a Biology major.
As a routine, I fired off more impossible questions. It must be hard to have a child like me. In my defence, I did not ask her what God eat like when I was 3. Still, I think she's happier when I ask her about The Beatles instead of why certain complex theories are not/possible.

Only a few people could keep up with me. I show wide range of interests, sometimes even things nobody in my big family ever heard of. Carl Jung? Who's that?
I guess that's why I'm liking blogs more and more. I get to talk and nobody had to look bored out of their mind. Hey, I'm not that selfish. I get uncomfortable when I make others bored, so I just talk about subjects they like, or ask for a subject. Hopefully they ask about something I know.

Umm, kay, that's a long post for the second time today. Night.

Scientifically improbable? Who cares! It's dramatic!

Dear God. The main reason why I hate soap operas:
They're. Scientifically. Effing. Bull___t.
My example would be from this Indonesian soap, Anugerah. (means Gift from God, but that's just bull__t)
Let's call the biological mother of this Anugerah (who suddenly is named Lugi) N, and his adopted mother W.
Lugi gets Leukemia. N donates her marrow. She becomes crippled. (And W just stands there, crying. She's useless like that.)
You know what, N, please read My Sister's Keeper. Anna is a 13 years old who endured having her blood and marrow taken for her sister Kate. She's healthy and dandy and is still able to play hockey. You had your marrow taken once, which probably is not as painful as falling from a 1 story building and become crippled. Which bone did the doctors poke?!

"The surgery is done under general anesthesia, which means the donor will be asleep and pain-free during the procedure. The bone marrow is removed from the hip bones."
- Medline Plus 

" It involves the removal of only a small proportion of the body's marrow, and therefore has little if any effect on the donor."
- About.com 
So according to Medline Plus, the marrow was taken from the hip bones. If they said that they took it from the spine (which was unbelievably stupid) then the cripple part would make some sense. Until then, I refuse to shut up about the all too wrong facts. I won't even start on countless morally-wrong crap.
If they weren't trying to hard to prolong the darn soap they wouldn't fail so bad.

So, I have one last request.
Please, please, please don't underestimate people's intellect. Don't teach them wrong things.